Introducing the new Solar Entertainment System! The perfect gaming console for the entire galaxy. It doesn’t matter if you work in an office, a commercial warehouse or from the comfort of your own couch; the SES can go with you anywhere. It weighs less than light itself and runs practically at FTL speeds! Our gaming system has so much battery storage that you won’t ever even have to charge it. We’ve achieved this by using commercial battery storage. Melbourne, Boston and Manchester* residents beware though! This console is so awesome that it might destroy productivity in your entire city.
*This is in no way an exhaustive list of cities that may suffer from reduced productivity as a direct result of our gaming console.
What sort of games do we have? Well, I’m glad you asked! We have games such as Crazy Bandicoot Who Looks More Like a Fox, I’m Famous, Exploding Pigs, Ultra Maria Sisters, Loudly Shouting: The Game, Hello and so much more. What’s that? All of those games are exclusive to the consoles they were originally released on? Well, that’s the beauty of the Solar Entertainment System. We’ve taken the best commercial solar systems and combined them with classic consoles in order to create one portable super console that uses only renewable energy! Don’t ask us how we did it! Don’t ask us if it’s legal! Just accept that this is the greatest gaming system ever created and buy it from us.
There’s no need to buy those bootlegged emulation systems because they simply don’t work like our entertainment system does. With all those cheap emulators you have to find the games yourself. The SES comes pre-loaded with every game you could ever want and is updated regularly with the newest releases. Now don’t ask any more questions. Order the SES from us before it goes away forever! The Solar Entertainment System won’t be around much longer.